Category Archives: Wellness and Fitness

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    When the past becomes the guide

    When The Past Becomes The Guide

    Category:Wellness and FitnessTags : 


    When The Past Becomes The Guide

    People tend to rely on the past as a means to prepare for the future.  While it is true we need to learn from our mistakes, are we allowing the past to control our future?

    Picking a time in my past that was riddled with mistakes and completely altered my life course, I ponder on how things could have gone differently.  We tend to focus only on the negative and often times allow that negativity to guide our present and future decisions.  Unfortunately, this way of thinking doesn’t help us resolve the conflicts or problems that haunt our memories.

    If we use the past as a guide and look for the things that went right instead of focusing on the negative,  we have a valuable tool at our disposal.  Using what we know today and incorporating the positive things of the past helps us make better future decisions.

    Past reflections:

    I recall a matter between an individual who was very close in the business sense as well as being a close friend.  I trusted this person with my back in every sense.  I knew he was going through an extreme amount of turmoil in his professional and family life.  I too was caught up in my own personal life struggles.  While we were very close,  we really didn’t know each other like we thought. If we could have looked at the struggles each of us was facing,  together, we might have avoided a head-on clash of wills.  A clash that would last for years.  An unfortunate error called “being human”.

    We each had our own set of values for life, complete with its checks and balances.  But were those checks and balances flawed?  Could either of us today remember the real story the way it really happened or did we just reflect the story as it related to our own concept of reality?    The pictures we have of life are often murky when we are facing difficulties.  Truth too often gets in the way.  Our anger and our feelings of being wounded cloud our better judgment.

    Letting the Past Guide the Way

    The upside to many of our past problems is knowing that the past is also filled with things that went right. Things that are good and bring light and happiness to the faces of those who care to remember.  If we use the things that went right we can help make the present much more relaxing, and the future peaceful.  Letting go of our flawed memories is a good start.

    I acknowledge that some things in the past need to stay there.  But for the honest mistakes and misunderstandings, the old saying Let It Go applies.   When the past becomes the guide you are on the path to regaining those valued relationships.   Trust can be re-established and friendships renewed, but it’s a focus on what went right that will get you there.

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    Work after the kids leave home

    Work after the kids leave home

    Category:Wellness and FitnessTags : 
    Work after the kids leave home

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    Have You Ever Fired Yourself?

    Have You Ever Fired Yourself?

    Category:Wellness and FitnessTags : 


    Have You Ever Fired Yourself?

    Have you ever come home and “fired yourself”?  Somedays are like that, and it takes us a long time to unwind from those moments that are a dig to our self-confidence.  Rebounding from those moments of self-disclosure are important.

    The day I allowed someone to steal my work. I had to start over and learn to trust again. I had to let go of the old me, and lean on the new me.

    In a working environment, I’m to the conclusion that if you aren’t in on key decisions and one of the movers and shakers – the fault may lie with them. “Them” being those in power, or above us in rank – someone else in the know. I’m not necessarily challenged by authority unless it has proven to be less than scrupulous.  So if the fault has to find a home, I hope it is with them, the movers and the shakers.

    But what if I am one of the movers and shakers? First, I don’t want someone else’s mistakes.  I want to start fresh and correct my own mistakes.  It’s a difficult task to jump into the middle of a project and take ownership.  Rather, it requires research and time; plus a sense of humility as you begin to deal with people who have no loyalty toward you at first.  You have to build those relationships and prove your worth.   Let others praise your work – there is greater value in that than praising yourself.  Humble yourself and you will be lifted up.

    Secondly, there are those who would like nothing better than to sit back and talk about opposing issues and add roadblocks to your designs, inventions, and other such handiwork. To those, I would refer to an old saying, “what other people think is really none of your business”.

    “What other people think is really none of your business”

    Somedays we have to just go home and fire ourselves.  That is such an awful word “fire” when used in the context of someone’s livelihood.  No one wants to lose a job – or asks to lose a job.  But it happens, for good or bad people get fired, laid off,  or suffer a reduction in force.   When you are the boss, the only person who can fire you is YOU!   That isn’t necessarily a bad thing when you are the boss.  Letting go of pieces of a project and learning to allow others through delegation to complete a task can be rewarding.  For one, you get rid of the stress, and two, you increase the value of one of your employees.

    Firing yourself doesn’t mean you can’t come back the next day with a better attitude.  Usually, when you get to this level you are ready for a change, a good swift kick in you know what, to mend those attitudes of displeasure.  Your own attitudes.

    When you walk in the door at work tomorrow give some thought to some valuable points when you do:

    1. You have a job
    2. People like working in a positive environment
    3. Money won’t buy you the thing you value most, respect of others
    4. Talk to the janitor – they know more than you think
    5. Be the janitor!
    6. Smile
    7. Shine it on
    8. Compliment someone who has earned a compliment – be sincere about that compliment
    9. Delegate if you can – but make it worthwhile to the delegatee.
    10. Rehire yourself

    It’s how you approach your life.  Not how others approach your life.  You make the final decision on how happy or successful you will be.  Success is measured in happiness.

    “Success is measured in happiness”


    The “As Usual” series

    Content creator & writer, blogger, social and digital media advocate. JB was born with a passion for writing and instructional design. JB is the owner of Radcliff Design.






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    Giants and Monsters Everywhere – On My!

    Category:Wellness and FitnessTags : 
    AAEAAQAAAAAAAAWUAAAAJDA3ZDdmMzYxLTFhNzUtNDI4ZS05ZDczLWQ0MGE4YTgwNTM2Yw Giants and Monsters Everywhere - On My!

    Giants and Monsters Everywhere - On My!

    Keeping with an October theme for Halloween,  I thought I would address the Giants and Monsters in our lives.   Be that our personal lives, our working environments, or where ever your giant monsters live. 

    Giants and Monsters Everywhere - On My!

    It's not hard to image a time when  you are sitting at your desk and the world is wonderful.  You are on top of your game, coworkers respect you, your clients rely on you, and you get satisfaction from mostly everything you do. Life is good.  The next day your world is shattered and left in ruin.   Shaking your head you can’t believe what is happening around you, why it is happening to you, and who’s to blame.  Something, or most likely someone sinister has just dug claws into your backside.  

    Being caught up in  maliciousness behavior from those in authority, or fellow co-workers – it all hurts the same.   The giant monster has just raised its ugly head, and it has a name; actually it has many names.  Names like:

    • Greed, gluttony, self-indulgence,  selfishness, indulgent, misleading
    •  deceiving,  dishonest, unreliable, deceitful, fraudulent, phony, sneaky
    • underhanded, insidious,  lying, mocking, scheming, shifty, treacherous
    • two-faced, and the list goes on. 

    I assume you get the point all too well.  What you don’t generally get is a way out of the situation.  Especially when the situation presents  you without  any warning.  What you need in these situations is  a means to  escape from the giant monster now beating at your door.  Seriously who actually plans for sinister life changing events brought on by others?

    Seriously who actually plans for sinister life changing events brought on by others?

    I have learned to plan for these types of attacks on some scale, but not all.  We all have those giant monsters that we have  to face in our lifetimes.   These giants come in all shapes and sizes.  While they can look overpowering and can plague us until we see no hope in escaping them – we generally still have that inner
    voice telling us to go on. Our giants often laugh in our faces, beating down at the walls we so carefully build up each day.  Yet,  that little voice can still be heard, ever so softly in the back ground saying, “keep going”.321 Giants and Monsters Everywhere - On My!

    Our giants often mock us and challenge us to come and defeat them.  Shaken to the core we have to run for our lives, cower in fear, or meet the aggressor on their own terms.  A lot of times the giant monsters are the comedians in the AAEAAQAAAAAAAAXMAAAAJDQxYTBhMGU0LWFiZTctNGU3NS04YjM5LTRjMzZiNzFlZmE3Yg Giants and Monsters Everywhere - On My!crowd, the know it all’s, and the blow-hard.  But not always, sometimes they are the quiet individual who is cold and calculating – so know your monsters.

    Once in a while life does throw us a bone and identifies a pathway out.  A pathway leading to triumph over adversity and challenge.  A pathway filled with a strategy which we use to bring about the defeat of the giant monsters we face.  If you see this pathway “TAKE IT”.  Stop making excuses it's time to take the giant monster down.

    If you see this pathway “ TAKE IT”.  Stop making excuses it's time to take the giant monster down.

    I am not one who believes in keeping your enemies (giants) close.  Rather,  ignoring them and keeping them at a distance is much more calculating and doesn’t produce additional stress.  Giving your enemy access to put their claws into you is a bad idea.  Some enemies have no filters for their aggressions. They simply strike out whenever they want.  There is no warning, no smoke signals – just volatile anger, and it can be over the simplest of things. AAEAAQAAAAAAAAUPAAAAJDQzM2JmOTZmLWVlNGItNDIwNS1iZmZmLTdmOWFkOTQ5MjNmOQ Giants and Monsters Everywhere - On My!Something as simple such as an IDEA, can set them off in your direction.

     You may think you haven’t done anything wrong, and you probably are right.   But if you think your enemy will be convinced of that fact, you are wasting your words.  You can’t fix things either – that only antagonizes the enemy more.  What I have learned is that the more you try to fix things the more the enemy sees those attempts as a way to undermine their position or status,  and or it stirs up feelings of  bitterness and expands the insecurity your enemy already has.

    Some people just don’t have a “fix it” meter.  They like controversy and if you feed into it – you give them power.   Does that sound  a little warped?  It is,   but that is how they operate.  You can’t fix them - their meter is broken, or the dipstick comes up empty.  All you can do is help yourself.  Build in escape routes so you can survive another day.

    It is time to take your Giant Monster down. 


    Walk away and leave them alone.

    Once you leave the office have nothing to do with your giant monster.  Take a stance that you will become  unresponsiveness to  their bantering.  Become so firm in that stance, to the point they no longer have any control over your thoughts and actions on the job or off.   Don’t’ friend them on social media, volunteer at the same events, nor do luncheons for old time sake. 

    Fight your giant monsters where they live – in your head, in your office, in your school, or event.  Plan for giant monster meetings if you have to go into one.  Quickly trivialize their attempts to gain power over you.  Just brush it off and ignore their challenges.    Make sure you take the high road and they will become just another giant monster under the bed, and once they are there, you will be able to gently sweep them away. 

    AAEAAQAAAAAAAAbFAAAAJGQ3NzVlN2NmLTQwNGYtNGFhNy04NjhmLWU3YTM4ZTA2ZTc0ZA Giants and Monsters Everywhere - On My!

    Monsters be gone.

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    But I Like My Rose Colored Glasses

    Category:Wellness and FitnessTags : 

    But I Like My Rose Colored Glasses

    Not that anyone would notice, but I kind of like my rose colored glasses.  Ten years ago maybe not, but  today - you bet.  I look at the world around me and I find myself at times wanting to shut it out.  Being a normally happy-go-lucky person, saying I want to shut the world out is a big statement for me.  

    I think age changes how we spend our free time, and who we choose to spend it with.  While a few of my friends could still be accused of running around with a lampshade on their head,  a larger number of them have graduated to being a bonified home body. I find myself stuck in the middle of my friends -   I'm not a wild child, nor a doormat.  But when the two sides get to be over-whelming for me - out come my rose colored glasses.  Glasses needed to be able to fit all those around me into that neat little mind box.

    hfhf But I Like My Rose Colored Glasses

    Glasses needed to be able to fit all those around me into that neat little mind box. 

    Age (and my glasses)  makes  tolerance for others easier.  It also makes me more aware of the little things that often get overlooked.  But with my rose colored glasses that is all I am searching for anyways - the little things

    From Monday to Friday, or whatever the workweek looks like - finding those spare moments to look at the positive and not focus on the negative aspects of the job are important.  It is okay if you take a peek through your rose colored glasses if you need a pick me up once in a while.  What they help you understand is: 

    1. You have a job 

    2. Maybe you have a great position or work with others on a wonderful project

    3. Maybe you have the ability to do what you want on the job, and people trust you. 

    4. Maybe you are the employee morale builder. 

    Whatever your circumstances, see number one above if you on the bridge of your nose and look forward.  I don't understand how people can be so dissatisfied with just having enough.  Maybe until people begin to  understand what it is like to not have enough -that  they will begin to see things through a different lens.  

    If you have something, something you earned - then life is good.  If you have nothing, and you haven't earned anything, make personal changes in your life.  Do whatever it is to help yourself feel satisfied.  Not too much, not too little, just enough to afford a set of rose colored glasses.  You'll need them.